Happiness

A few days ago, I went to the hairdresser, as I have every 6 weeks for the decades. It is always fun -- he's a great guy, our conversation is lively, and it is the only time that my hair is "big" for about an hour. Also, he runs perpetually late, so I have the opportunity to read his incredible magazine collection. The first mag I picked up had an article titled "Let the Joy Shine Through" -- based on the book Happy for No Reason by Marci Shimoff and Carol Kline.

I could dissect the whole article, but the bottom line, shown anecdotally and via neuroscience research, is that people can choose to be happy, or they can choose to be unhappy. In the exact same way that you can choose coffee or tea, exercise or television, every single simple choice we each make daily -- each and every one of us can choose to be happy.

There are certainly ways to learn to be happy -- some attitudinal, some action-oriented, and some both. The last "tip" they give in the article is to find things with passion and purpose. That is, of course, both attitudinal AND action-oriented. That doesn't mean you have to dedicate your life to things which intrinsically have purpose, it means putting passion and purpose into everything you do. Like most everybody else, I work for a living, and have had a bunch of jobs and careers over my working life. I can choose (as can you all) to go through the motions, doing task "A" followed by task "B", -OR- I can choose to endeavor to be the very best I can be at whatever I do, putting as much energy into it as possible, and using my work to help affect positive change by what I undertake. And it doesn't matter whether you are a short-order cook committed to the best tasting pancakes possible, a doctor choosing to treat a whole patient instead of the symptom set with which the patient presents, a seamstress sewing pockets on jeans (do it with passion and whoever wears them feels wonderful all day), or a politician committed to message over "regular" politics.

Some of you reading this have known me all my life. Some of you are friends of friends, and we have never met. For those that don't "know" me -- I have lived a life that "works" and at times, one that does not. I choose the former because it's just better. It's better to live a life of purpose, and gratitude, and commitment, one dedicated to healing the world, and making it better, even if some days that only means making someone smile who would not have otherwise. That is your choice, too, every day. (If you want to be happy and don't know how, buy the book -- it functions as an owner's manual...)

After I started working on this piece, knowing it would be saved for the day before the PA primary, "bittergate" erupted. Olivia and I did the park at sunrise the day after the tape was released - watching the sun go from pink to orange over the pond. Watching a pair of geese interact on the shoreline. Smelling the coming of spring, feeling the air in our faces as one of us ran the path, and the other chased deer. And while I’m sure Olivia's prime thought was "DEER!!!!" mine thoughts ran to how many people in our country really ARE bitter. How they chose to blame whoever they can for their misfortunes, how they grab onto what "was" but will never be again.

The PA primary contest tomorrow is actually a pitched battle between happiness and bitterness.

"Happiness" does not mean that everything works perfectly for someone on every day of his/her life. It means that whatever happens, good or bad, your ATTITUDE makes you appreciate the good, revel in joy, and work to overcome sadness and defeat when they occur. It means, in a political context, that you fix problems instead of complaining about them. You find solutions to difficult issues by working together in lieu of inciting further divisions. It means you HONESTLY address what is wrong with domestic and foreign situations and forge solutions based on the best possible outcome.

If instead you choose bitterness, you cling tenaciously to non-workable policies, gutter politics, "solutions" which have failed in the past (remembering that the definition of "stupidity" is "doing the same thing the same way and expecting a different outcome") AND ABOVE ALL ELSE you attack the person instead of staying on the issues. Bitter politics are the politics of desperation.

Today, as you go about your day, choose to be happy. Choose to put energy in all you do, take pride in your undertakings. Life can be a tapestry, it need not be a flat print.

And tomorrow, if you live in Pennsylvania, choose to vote for hope, and change, and happiness. Choose to vote for the promise of a better world, one based on smart responses, innovative solutions, and thinking outside the known box. When you go to mark that ballot -- remember Whitewater, Monica Lewinsky, Vince Foster, NAFTA, China, ignoring the 1993 bombing of the World Trade Center, the closed discussions and then choose to remember that "winning" need not be a zero sum game. Choose Obama, because it matters, and because one vote really can change world for the better.